The Abercrombie Moose

Today was a great day! Abbas’ restaurant was amazing. I knew he could cook, but I think I just didn’t realize how well!!

After visiting Abbas we went to the mall. I have to say, I understand now how my parents and grandparents felt when taking me shopping for clothes! It looks like the stores went dumpster diving at the Goodwill store! If I’m going to pay $60 for jeans I promise you they are not going to have holes in them!

I have to admit though that Abercrombie was quite interesting. Not for the clothes, mind you. I got the biggest kick out of the moose. Yes, the moose. Allow me to explain.

Me: (looking at the moose head over the cashwrap) Wow! That’s the biggest moose I’ve ever seen.

My son and his friend: Uh-huh.

Me: No, I’m serious. But poor moose, he’s dead. (pause and frown) Poor moose.

Male Cashier: Are you sure he’s dead.

Me: (regarding moose thoughtfully) Yes, I believe I’m sure. Typically when one’s head is severed from one’s body death is certain.

Male Cashier: It’s OK; it’s a fake moose.

Me: (again regarding the moose with some intensity) No, we have a lot of dead animals at our house. That is a taxidermied moose.

Male Cashier: (a look of utter shock on his face)

Me: (quick to reassure we’re not complete weirdos) Taxidermied animals. On the walls.

My son: (after observing the moose with almost as much intensity as I had) Duuuuude.

Me: (somewhat concerned) What?

My son: Dude-mom, that’s a 12 on 12 rack.

Me: (quickly counting points) Duuuuude, you’re right. Impressive.

Male Cashier: (clearly not a hunter) Is that good?

Me and my son: (in unison) Yeah, man, way good.

Me: Poor moose.

Male Cashier: Really it’s OK; he’s fake.

Me: No he’s not. (looking up at the moose again) Can I pet his nose?

Male Cashier: (moving a box out of the way) Sure.

Me: (stroking moose nose and ruffling his whiskers) Dude, he’s real; he still has his whiskers.

Male Cashier: No, really I don’t think he is.

Me: (laughing) OK. If you say so. Thanks for indulging my weirdness.

Please bear in mind, we were NOT fighting. In fact there was much laughing and smiling going on. My son and his friend even petted the moose! I would have taken my girlfriend back to pet the moose but she wasn’t up for petting dead moose. She is such a city slicker!

The cashier was very nice. Very indulgent. Perhaps he was afraid? LOL