Saturday, November 26, 2011

Life Is A Verb

I tend to people watch. I don’t mean the people watching you might do at the mall -- although I admit to having indulged in that brand of people watching as well. The type of people watching I’m talking about here is the more in depth, ongoing type of observation made of those in your life on a regular/recurring basis. One thing that strikes me is that we don’t know how to live! Sure, we have moments, maybe even fairly large segments of time where we are at least content, if not happy. But on the whole we aren’t living. Not truly living.

Life is a verb. Life is meant to be lived purposefully. Instead of trudging through life simply enduring we should actively participate. Most of us live life as a noun. Nouns are usually things. Things don’t really do anything. They simply are there until acted upon by an outside force. That’s not how life was meant to be lived. And it surely isn’t how life is enjoyed.

I’ve found the most important aspect to living life as a verb is to be an active participant in your own life. For me, this required a profound shift in my thinking. I had to leave behind the mistaken notion that life was something that happed to me and only required a reactionary response. That required me to reprogram myself to acknowledge that the things that happened in my life were the results of my decisions and actions -- or lack thereof. In essence I had to take responsibility for my life. (A novel idea for many people unfortunately.)

Once I accepted my role in determining my future, I then had to decide what I would do as a result of my newly acquired knowledge. For me it wasn’t a difficult decision. I’m a take charge type of person. My answer was to take life by the horns and have a come to Jesus meeting with it. No longer was life a big scary monster that happened to me and I just had to accept it. Nope. I am the captain of that ship now and we’re going where I want to go.

A big part of taking charge was sitting down and taking inventory. I looked at every aspect of my life from religion to housekeeping. Yes, even housekeeping. I decided how the present condition of that particular aspect of my life made me feel. Then I asked myself if it was even something I wanted in my life at all. Especially if that particular aspect of my life made me feel inferior or evoked some other negative feeling. I’ll be honest, most of the things that made me feel bad were eliminated. In most cases it became obvious these things were aspects of my life other people felt needed to be there.

In addition to scrutinizing every aspect of my life, I also took a long hard look at the people in my life. Sad to say, I had to eliminate some of them as well. I simply did not want or need drama, spitefulness and hatefulness in my life. Those were not easy decisions to make, but I could not overlook the fact that after spending time with some people I left feeling worse than when I started out.

Since I’ve made these changes, I can say I actually have a much better outlook on life. I certainly feel more mentally balanced and so much of the stress I used to experience has melted away. That’s not to say everything is great and fine and we all live happily ever after, but things are at least on a more even keel. And I’ve freed myself up to more actively participate in my own life.